On Choosing S-Type Uniforms

Most of this post is best suited for consideration when choosing a daily uniform/dress code, rather than one for scenes or events, which might need different considerations. This post is written as if talking to a D/M-type for simplicity.

Starting off, consider: what level of detail do you want to go into? Down to hex color codes, or “something blueish”? A specific dress, or “no pants”? Some details may be more important to you than others. Maybe polo shirts are really important, but hairstyle couldn’t matter less. Are you looking more to lay things out in terms of what’s okay, or what’s not okay?

Consider things that are more the surrounding rules than the uniform itself. What can be done without approval in the moment? What always needs approval? Are you planning on the occasional exception? Is it important to keep the uniform neat-looking?

Now consider the categories of clothes the s-type may have reason to wear. For example: daily, formalwear, activewear, swimwear, pajamas. You’ll want to make sure those are covered in some way. Do they have a job or any other obligations that require specific clothing—how can you work with that?

Within those, consider each item of clothing to be addressed. For example: shirts/tops, pants/bottoms, socks, underwear, bras, shoes, jackets. And accessories—can they be worn, which ones, when, and where on the body? If they wear any mark of ownership, such as a collar, that’s important to note. Are there any “features” that are important—having pockets, being waterproof?

Now think beyond clothes. Shaving rules? What about their nails? Makeup—if allowed, when, and what kind? Daily hairstyle? A step up: body mods. Piercings—if allowed, where, and what kind of jewelry? Tattoos—if allowed, where, and of what? Hair dye—what color? Cutting their hair—what style?

Consider some general concepts. Is it important that they look “submissive”—and what does that look like? Would you rather skew a little modest, or a little not? What do you yourself wear—and how do you want their look to compare? Do you want a more plain everyday look, or something that stands out? Where do you want to fall on the casual/formal scale? If you’re weighing in the s-type’s opinion—what do they think of your ideas?

Now some practical matters. Are you okay with the vanilla world seeing this uniform, if they will? Is the uniform practical for what the s-type does with their time? Is it comfortable, if that’s important? How easily/quickly can you acquire it in the s-type’s size—now, and likely in the future? What amounts of money are involved, and who’s responsible? How does it fit the weather they’ll encounter—if there are big shifts between seasons, do you want the uniform to shift with it?

For reference, how my slave uniform currently works (updated). Mistress chose a specific green dress that I wear every day. For the rest of my daily uniform, I wear black knee socks, a black bra, specific black underwear, my collar, and my smart watch (kept charged, and worn on my left wrist). My hair is to be left down. Shoes, if I wear them, are high top black sneakers. I’m allowed to choose my own jackets and pajamas. Other notes we have are that my uniform should look nice, clean, and of an appropriate size. Otherwise, I am to shave any body hair whenever I shower, and keep my nails short. Anything and everything else is to be approved.

Internal Enslavement: A Realization

In a conversation with Mistress last night, I mentioned my kinky priorities had shifted over time. She asked me to elaborate, and I thought I knew where my elaboration was going. I was rambling a little as we were already having a psychological kind of conversation, but I thought I knew my elaboration would end up at, “Basically, more interested in exploring service and protocol concepts than sex or play concepts.”

I pretty much said those words eventually, but first got way into something else that was, I think, more interesting to both of us anyway.

I talked about a realization that I’d had the other night, which basically came back to “I don’t think I’m psychologically capable of disobeying you anymore”.

Let me clarify that disobedience has never been my nature to begin with, even what most people classify as harmless bratting often boggles me. But there’s a difference between exercising self-control and behaving, and not being capable of choosing the alternative.

The part that I realized during the conversation was an important clarification. What I meant by not being able to choose the alternative was mostly that in any given situation, it doesn’t occur to me. Even situations that have long, emotional mental processes involved, ones where in a more egalitarian situation, I’d probably be justified in some high level of push-back. And my brain in those situations now comes up with… zero resistance. Even thinking in a meta sense about past situations I used as examples, I still kind of couldn’t wrap my head around responding differently. I just had the awareness that in a different power structure (or lack thereof), my response could and probably would be very different and resistant.

I’m not talking about external behavior here, but rather what my brain does. In the past, I might have still had the same external response—but I know that what was going on in my head was different.

I think this change has happened gradually over time, but probably accelerated in the last few months—and a lot of our general life stuff got a lot better sorted then, so maybe it makes sense. It also seems to have happened in part while I wasn’t looking, so to speak. Hitting some level of complete acceptance of slavery. I’ve looked into the phrase “internal enslavement” before, but now… I feel like I get so much more of it.

So it was a super exciting revelation for me, and I think for Mistress, too.